Porto escaped the colossal destruction inflicted on Lisbon in 1755. The earthquake crunched into the city on All Saints\u2019 Day, then tag-teamed in a tsunami and a fire. This happened exactly four days and 226 years before my birthday. What I\u2019m trying to say is: it wasn\u2019t my fault.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was probably Sofia\u2019s fault. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This may also be why everyone in Porto was so much nicer than everyone in the south. Porto\u2019s official nickname is Invicta<\/em>\u2014the Unvanquished City\u2014after it endured a year-long siege in the 1830s. “Unvanquished” seems a little grandiose for only withstanding a one year siege, but I’m not expert. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Driving in Portugal is pretty okay. Better than Italy, worse than the UK. It\u2019s not much <\/em>better than Italy, though. The lanes are mostly legally binding, but more in a “participation may vary” way than in an actual-rules way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We had a really good time and enjoyed the shit out of Porto. It has tiled buildings, bananas steep streets, a gorgeous riverfront, and a local sandwich (the francesinha) which we didn’t try on account of the vegetarian thing. Sofia said it’s tits, though. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Fun fact: many of the famous port-wine cellars associated with Porto are actually across the river in Vila Nova de Gaia, which is technically a different city. So, port wine should be called Vila Nova de Gaia wine. Or gaia wine. Or nova de gaia wine. Or something like that. <\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019d be far more inclined to live in Porto than Lisbon. The weather is cooler, the vibe is better, and the hills guarantee you’ll have calves like squash. Like, big squash. Not tiny, bitch squash. <\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sweetchuckyb.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/Portugal-9778-scaled.jpg?fit=683%2C1024&ssl=1\")
This is Edif\u00edcio da Livraria Nelita built in 1942. It's super art-deco and really cool-looking! This was part of Porto's book, paper and printing trade (books are still a big deal in Portugal). That relief might be Gutenberg (of the bible fame; I'm not sure, though).<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> This is the NON-FUNCTIONING FOUNTAIN. The Fonte da Pra\u00e7a da Ribeira, AKA the Fonte de S\u00e3o Jo\u00e3o. It's apparently a re-model from the late 18th century. It was supposed to be way fancier, but after it was built between 1784 and 1786, the whole thing was scaled down. The saint statue is John The Baptist. It sucks because it was made in 2000. When this area was excavated in the 80s, they found a chafariz from the 1600s! That's a Spanish\/Arabic word for 'fountain', I think. The dumb statue of John the Baptist is from 2000. The whole joint was excavated in the 80s and they found evidence of a fountain from the 1600s! Pretty cool....<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> With the bridge.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> They changed the color of the lights in the monastery.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Another narrow alley.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> A lit, tiled tunnel.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> A dark alley<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Portuguese graffiti.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Buildings are abandoned as fuck in Portugal. They're the embodiment of the wealth of assholes, rotting while people don't have houses to live in.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> A cool building corner.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> A first edition of something or something.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Sofia in the book shop outside the bell tower.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> <\/a> <\/div> <\/div> The bells in the bell tower.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> <\/a> <\/div> <\/div> A nice photo of me!<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Sofia on the tower balcony.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> The city slightly later.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> The city with a longer exposure.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> This is the first of a couple of photos of the Monastery of Serra do Pilar. It's across the river from Porto (and where Sofia was compulsively buying jewelry) in Vil Nova de Gaia just above the Dom Luis I Bridge; more pictures of that in a minute.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Cool clock tower.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Loved shooting down on the city.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Sofia and the city of Porto.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> From the top of the tower.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Sunset on the bell-tower.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Dude! I thought Pixo was dead. I stand corrected.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> More art-deco shit.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> I wonder how related to "Portugal" "Porto" is. Maybe it should be "Portogal"? I don't know. I didn't name the fuckin' place. Back off, man!<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Buildings in Porto.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> I think this is the Virgin Mary. Not sure. It's a lady deified in a church in Portugal. Odds are it's Josh's mom.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Bigger goldish angle.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Look. I don't know if this is gold, but this is goldish, for sure. It would be cooler if it were goldfish.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> <\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Sofia looking good in front of a FUNCTIONING FOUNTAIN! I love nothing more than a functioning fountain.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Their mascot is a peacock. It's peacocking. Peahens can't peacock like this. Just not possible.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> This clothing store has kick-ass font and a rad mascot.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> A neat-looking church.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Cool clock tower. We kept ending up here.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> They got dollies boxed up pretty elaborately, here.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> This guy stroked his cross seductively for several minutes.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> I like ceilings.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Cool shot.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Fuck the Shroud of Turin; they have Jesus in Porto.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div> Gold paint cannot be under-used by Catholic churches out here.<\/span><\/span><\/a> <\/div> <\/div>